Hello Andy,
Looks like you and I ran into a similar problem. I'm currently trying to figure out how get a RBD Fractured Object (glued, Bullet Solver) to play nice with different fields and constraints but I'm finding it's harder than it looks. I did try switching the solver type and that does help in some ways. However, in does present other issues—all which of I'd rather avoid for my particular scene. It's funny you mention plugging things into the rigidbody node itself because I tried that too.
Considering I'm coming from Maya and I'm not all that familiar with Houdini yet, I thought I would be able to find some sort of out of the box solution (at least by digging in the shelf). But like you. to my knowledge there really isn't a well documented reference for approaching this type of thing... Any chance have you found any sort of solution for using POP Forces along with RBD Packed Objects? Just wondering.... if so, I'd appreciate any input. Thanks!